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"You stayed here because you want to be here. You are strong and determined. I saw you fight off a Worgen, and you were fierce. Your cats were fierce." He said gently "You can do this and it is time to start moving forward again."
I looked up at him, upset, ready to yell at him, to fight him, or tell him he was wrong and then I saw the gentleness in his eyes. He meant every word.
"Okay..." I said softly.
"Look it may not be perfect and it may take you some time to get over this but you will. It's okay to get hurt and be broken for a little while, but you cannot let that stop you. You are too strong to let it stop you. It is time for you to get up." He said as he extended his hand. "Go out and do a little bit, even if you can't do a lot, you need to start again."
I took his hand and he pulled me up and hastely pushed me out of the room.
"Goodbye for now," He said hastily through the door.
"Wait, I don't know your name," I yelled back.
"Aslathranthos" He said. "Go on Allinaya no more stalling."
"But how did you know...?" He cut me off
"I overheard, a guard talking to you. Now go on." He said with a huff.
Slowly we crept back outside and spoke to a guard. I wanted to run back inside and stay in a little ball but I used every ounce of willpower to go in the direction of the quest instead.
Trembling I made my way forward.
Finally, after what seemed like forever, we got to the people that needed help.
Thinking about it now, doing quests for the undead is probably not the best way to help me get over my fears. Their morals are... questionable at best. I don't know how my people would feel about them working on a plague to whip out the world... or how I feel about it for that matter. After helping the people of Tirisfal, I think we may consider our debt paid and move on to help some other people instead...
Reluctantly we did bring the items they asked for. The undead made me wonder. Were they right because just like anyone else they want to continue their race or were the people trying to stop them right? I guess not all questions are easily answered but with this one, I am leaning towards the people trying to stop them.
I had gotten so lost in the quests that I didn't even realize how late it was or that I hadn't thought about the Worgen rogues for a while. This realization brought another wave of fear but it also brought a little relief. I had gone for hours without thinking about them or having them hunt me. Aslathranthos was right, I needed to be out here.
In a weird way, it is nice fighting the mindless scourge. It made me feel strong again. Like I did when we fought Dar'Khan and his minions. Since they are zombified versions of themselves and have nothing going on upstairs, I don't feel any guilt about killing them. I just hope we finally put them to rest. Being trapped in undeath and cursed to exist but having no control over your body is a terrible fate.
A loud crack happened in the distance. For a second I panicked and couldn't catch my breath. Was it a Worgen rogue? No... no it wasn't it was a Bonecaster who lost its footing a smashed to the ground.
Huffing and puffing, I tried to catch my breath. Junelight and Slyboots pushed themselves against me trying to snuggle up to me and lick my face. I was so distressed that I stressed them out and they desperately were trying to comfort me.
"It's okay.. I'm okay" I said as calmly as I could between breathes.
It took me a little bit to calm down. Lucky for me the scourge are mindless and didn't even notice us. These rogues had caused me so much panic and anxiety. I wondered if I would ever be back to my old self.
At the very least. I managed to move forward today. It wasn't as fast as I wanted and I wasn't as fearless as I wanted to be, but at least I started moving again.
It is time to rest now, but tomorrow. I will go back out again...
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